The moment an artist starts comparing their self to another artist is the moment they lose the opportunity to create something truly YOU-nique... thoughts on creating genuinely new and unmatched art by tapping into your true identity.
Once upon a time, after finishing my shift at the sushi restaurant where I worked as a hostess, I ran over to a little venue called 12th and Porter to say hi to a friend before going home to get off my feet after a long day. I rushed inside and found that I had missed the band, but I wasn't too concerned. I said hi to my friend Pricilla and she immediately introduced me to a couple of fellas. Conversation with one of them came quickly and easily and we were joking and bantering in a matter of moments. My interested was piqued and my plans for the evening changed. We talked until 3 in the morning. Five or so years later, he and I wrote this song together as we watched our daughter crawl across the floor after a toy.
Happy Valentines Day. Enjoy.
March 29th, in the dark of the night, I woke up. I was feeling things I had never felt before. I was getting signals that had only ever been described to me. I felt tightening sensations across my stomach and I wondered, is this going to be it? I relaxed as much as possible and dozed as I could. After a few hours I could no longer sleep through them and I was feeling more certain that what I had been waiting months for was now upon me....
When I found myself crying in the bathtub listening to Some Nights by Fun, I felt a strange mix of fear, power and pain. I tried to pinpoint the reason I was crying. I realized it was because I can't stop fighting. And I'm so tired. I want to give up so bad right now. I want to rest. But I know I won't stop fighting. I just won't. I can't. I'm gonna kick and scream for a moment, lose all hope and vision for a short while and then slap some water on my face, look in the mirror and pull my boot straps up. This is the real raw honest truth. This shit is not easy. No matter what you do. Life is not easy. And if you push back against anything, try and make a change, do something great, care, it gets even harder. It feels like we're trying to lift the world and move it. All of the details involved in just getting moved into the airstream and heading out loom over us like a mountain. So many unknowns, mistakes, our fingers pointing at ourselves over and over, as we bulldoze through everything in our path, even some people, for which I deeply ache. But to the part of me waving the white flag, head down, the stronger part of me is saying gently, you know you're not gonna do that. And I know I'm not. Later I got to talk to a dear friend on the phone, the kind of friend who you can be honest with and say "not so good" to when they say "how are you?"and she pointed me to a spot-on analogy for the situation. A fellow mother, she reminded me of that pivotal and painful part of labor when you are dilating from 8 to 10 cm, before you are ready to push, which is called transition. I easily recalled that excruciating period that preceded the most euphoric and transcendent moment of my life when I first held my baby girl. I thought I couldn't do it. I tried to climb out of the large tub like I could just give up and go home. But then, I did it. Wow, I did it. I will never cease to be proud of and empowered by those hours of labor and delivery. Similarly, something is being birthed in our lives right now. It's grown for months inside of us and now it's time. We've labored and labored and it's about to be here. I can tell that we are right smack in the middle of transition because I've lost the vision and I feel like giving up, sure I simply cannot do this. But once I see where we are, I know we're almost there. It won't be much longer now. So I'll continue to put one foot in front of the other. I've done it before and I can do it again.